Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Mystery Box

Mystery Box
Cash money mega super fun mystery!

This is one sick nasty auction for some sick nasty mystery stuff!

as per ebay rules you are buying a box and what i put in the box is a gift. period no returns all sales final, yatah yatah yah. however! what could be in the box? GOOD QUESTION!!

VIEW AUCTION HERE

For A Woman's Pleasure

For A Woman's Pleasure
A Woman's Pleasure!

Progressive Mystery Auction.

The more you bid - the more you win!

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Can You Take The Heat

Can You Take The Heat
CAN YOU TAKE THE HEAT??? THIS AUCTION IS SURE TO BE HOT, HOT, HOT!!!

You are bidding on a 16 oz. bottle of RED HOT shower gel, bubble bath, shampoo 3 in 1 from Bath & Body Works. That is ALL you are bidding on! Anything included in the box with this 3 in 1 will be my gifts to you.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

This King Will Treat You Like A Queen

This King Will Treat You Like A Queen
Hello! Thanks for stopping by my auction!

Now, many of you have probably viewed my King that will make you run and scream,

so now I have this handsome King that will treat you like a queen!

Well...in reality,

he will not be the one treating you like a Queen...I will,

but you must admit, he is nice to look at. ;)

Now, when you think of living like a Queen, what comes to mind?

Jewelry?

Diamonds?

Pampering?

Pretty much the BEST of everything, correct?

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This King Will Make You Run And Scream!

This King Will Make You Run And Scream
This King will make you want to scream.

OMG

Ok...now that I got you here...can you please take a look at this!

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My Chocolate Lips

My Chocolate Lips
My Chocolate Lips, so Hot, So Delicious and Sooo Tempting!

YOU ARE BIDDING ON A HERSHEYS SMORES MAKER WITH BONUS DESSERT FONDUE... COMES NEW IN BOX RETAILS FOR $59.99 THIS HAS SMORES MAKER GRILL, SNUFFER, BURNER HANDLE, BURNER HOLDER, HERSHEYS CHOCOLATE INSERT PLATE THAT HOLDS CHOCOLATE BARS, MARSHMALLOWS AND GRAHAM CRACKERS, MARSHMALLOW ROASTING FORKS... ALSO INSIDE THIS BOX IS

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What's In My Pot???

What's In My Pot
What's in my pot?

Guarded by a Leprechaun, for this I have been told.

Up for bid I have this pot, this pot won't come alone.

Nor will it be guarded by the Leprechaun from above.

But will contain lots of goodies shipped to you with love.

So, if you feel the Luck O' The Irish and want to take a chance...

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Restraint Straight Jacket

Restraint Straight Jacket
Check my store for all sizes, different styles and colors! This Size extra small fits chest sizes 32"-34".It has 3 sets of D-rings down the back, a crotch strap AND and a strap for the arms.It also has a strap in front to prevent the arms from being pulled over the head.This item is NEW and has NEVER been worn. It is made of duck cloth canvas.The entire piece is sewn together using upholstery thread. Stitching is reinforced for strength. Heavy duty Dee rings and snaps are made of nickel plated.

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Goddess Mystery Auction

Goddess Mystery Auction
FEEL LIKE A GODDESS!! This Mystery auction will help you feel like the Goddess you are!!! I am here to help you Pamper yourself---you deserve it girl!! Men---you need to make your special lady feel like the Goddess she is!!!

VIEW AUCTION HERE

That's MR. Bunny To You.

That's MR. Bunny To You
This will be a progressive auction, so the higher the bids go, the more stuff Mr. Bunny will fill up for you as a THANK YOU GIFT because he thinks you’re SOMEBUNNY SPECIAL!! The purse can only hold so much so once it’s full with surprise gifts, he will fill up the box that the purse goes into to ship it to you!

Now, to start, even though you are bidding on Mr. Bunny’s purse and ONLY the purse, I KNOW for a FACT that he has something SPECIAL for you inside as a THANK YOU gift for buying his purse! It blings, it’s REAL AND it’s even PICTURED in the 2nd photo!! Now, Mr. Bunny asks that you all don’t mention any of this to Mrs. Bunny (who will be presenting herself shortly after Mr. Bunny’s auction is over with) so keep it a hush on what BLING he’s got for you cause he doesn’t want to get in trouble with the Mrs. Know what I mean? ;-) Hey, she’s the one who said, “you can look, but DON’T TOUCH!”

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Thanks A Million!

Thanks A Million
THIS AUCTION IS MY WAY OF SAYING THANK YOU TO ALL OF THE EBAYERS WHO HAVE BEEN SO GREAT TO ME IN THE PAST. I CALL IT THANKS A MILLION!

I AM CONSIDERING TAKING A BREAK FROM EBAY FOR ALOT OF REASONS AND WANTED TO DO ONE BIG AUCTION BEFORE I MADE MY FINAL DECISION.

I HAVE MET ALOT OF WONDERFUL PEOPLE HERE ON EBAY. TO THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE SUPPORTED ME AND MADE EBAY ENJOYABLE I THANK YOU. BUT... I HAVE RECENTLY BEEN MADE LESS THAN HAPPY WITH SOME WHO HAVE NOT ONLY FALSELY ADVERTISED ITEMS AND THE NON PAYING BIDDERS OR THE ONES WHO WONT RESPOND TO YOUR EMAILS BECAUSE THEY KNOW THE GIG IS UP !

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Hay

Hay
Hay! How are you doing?

You're bidding on Hay!

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Tuesday, February 27, 2007

I Will Do Whatever You Want Me To...

I Will Do Whatever You Want Me To
Ahh!! What's that? College around the corner!! Help me pay off some of my future tuition!!

What you are bidding on is a video of me.....doing anything you want.* Make sure when you pay, through paypal only, to note what it is you want me to do in the video. This has NEVER been done before!!

Whether it be lip synching to your favorite song, doing a special dance, or wishing that loved one a happy birthday, you want it, you got it. I will be your performing monkey.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Everyone Makes Mistakes

Everyone Makes Mistakes
See even Bill Gates got in a little trouble when he was young. My point is everyone makes mistakes. Just don't let it be you my friend. If you pass up FREE 1 UP you are making the mistake of your life!

We are 36,000 members strong and growing BY THE MINUTE! I want you to get in on this and come to one teleconference online and just listen how excited these members are and the success stories they are telling.

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More Than You Can Handle

More Than You Can Handle
HELP ME - HELP YOU!

MYSTERY AUCTION!

GET IT IN THE BLOW HOLE, BABY!

This DOUBLE "Z" size auction will freak you out, crush you with wonder... It will get you in the blow hole! I promise!

In the fanciest dang package Norbit could find is a box... a box full of surprises of color! Now, ebay says if it is a mystery, I must specify with you... you are bidding on a box!

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Peace Of Mind

Peace Of Mind
As funny as this might sound, my auction is selling a peace of mind.

I was not born with a famous last name or wealthy family, so like many others I have been forced to work for everything that I have. Don’t get me wrong this is not a problem to me but, here is my situation. I joined the military years ago and, defended my country for 7 years. When my wife and I decided to move over to the civilian side, we realized that life out here is very, very hard. All of my life I have helped people and never asked for anything in return. This has always made me feel good at the end of the day, but I have always waited for my turn when someone would help me out.

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eBay Celebrity Drawing

eBay Celebrity Drawing
I am the Ebay Artist behind all of the Ebay Celebrity Drawings of 2007.

I am hoping this would be a special auction as I am drawing my own character.

Just like the other Ebay Celebrity Drawings, this could be a part of your collection or be the first to own SGArtDesigns own portrait.

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SLOW Happy Birthday Cat...

SLOW Happy Birthday Cat
HAPPY 50TH BIRTHDAY CAT IN THE HAT!! THIS IS THE ACTUAL AND ONLY ONE EVER BUILT; SUPER LUXURIOUS OMNIDIRECTIONAL WHATCHAMAJIGGER, OR S.L.O.W.. IT WAS CUSTOM BUILT AT A COST OF $1.2 MILLION FOR USE IN DR. SEUSS'S "THE CAT IN THE HAT". THE CAR IS AMAZING! AND FULLY FUNCTIONAL! IT IS POWERED BY AN ELECTRIC MOTOR PUSHING THIS WACKY CREATION TO A TOP SPEED OF 43MPH. COMPLETELY CUSTOM WITH EVERY PART HAND-FABRICATED AND CRAFTED. IT HAS TO BE ONE OF, IF NOT THE MOST, IMPRESSIVE PIECE OF HOLLYWOOD AUTOMOBILE HISTORY EVER BUILT.

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Rock With Many Faces

Rock With Many Faces
THIS ROCK WAS GIVEN TO ME BY MY HUSBAND!! IT IS VERY INTERESTING IT HAS MANY FACES ON IT!! ANIMAL, A SMALL CHILD,OLD MAN,AND SOME MONSTER FACES.. I HAVE NEVER SEEN A ROCK LIKE THIS BEFORE..

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Traveling Blue Jeans Babe!

Traveling Blue Jeans Babe
YEP... YOU GUESSED IT... HERE THEY ARE AGAIN!!!

SO WHERE WILL THEY END UP

NEXT?

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Corn Dog Air Fresheners

Corn Dog Air Fresheners
The corn dog is quite possibly the best food on a stick ever created! Close your eyes and you can almost smell the sweet honey batter and the steaming, salty meat product nestled inside. This 6-1/4" long air freshener has the sharp aroma of bright yellow mustard, which might not make your car smell the best, but it will make all of your passengers drool. Comes with a string for hanging. Bagged with illustrated header.

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Fire Bell Alarm Clock

Fire Bell Alarm Clock
FREE Calculator Pen Set with every purchase of $19.99 or more

OR

FREE Robotic Reading Light with...

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Monday, February 26, 2007

Martian Estate For Sale

Martian Estate For Sale
A brilliant gift for a Birthday, Christmas, or any other occasion!

Excellent present for a new born child!

Potential prudent investment!

Interesting and great conversation piece!

Look at it when it's close to Earth!

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Scrub Your Ex Away

Scrub Your Ex Away
Scrub Away Magic Washcloths. Scrub away your Ex! Expands in water to a wash cloth!

Available in pink or blue. You are purchasing a single magic wathcloth in either pink or blue.

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Bad Boom Box.

Bad Boom Box
You are bidding on One Bad Boom Box!

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Nothing

Nothing
nothing sponsered by www.goofyauctions.com

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Alien In My Snow!

Alien In My Snow
Ok. Talk about weird. These odd markings were in the snow outside my home this afternoon. The wind picked up whistling through the trees. I looked outside checking for downed limbs and to my surprise saw this weird shape in the snow. Alien or snow angel? Look at the large shape but note at the bottom of the shape is a face with eyes & nose.

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Skin Mask? Gross!

Skin Mask? Gross
WEIRD Vintage Javalina SKIN MASK Taxidery The fur is soft but the leather part is hard I think this can be reworked to be pliable but dont know much about taxidermy myself, would be great for artist or someone who does wizard or witch craft in the SCA or Renaissance fairs Wonderful for a costume or booth decor very medieval gothic castle measures 24"x 22"x 5"in depth so a big piece of skin Now the Rules of the contract: PLEASE DO NOT BID ON OUR ITEMS IF YOU ARE UNWILLING TO INFORM US ABOUT A PROBLEM BEFORE LEAVING NEGATIVE FEEDBACK. DO NOT Bid if you do not plan to follow through with payment! DO NOT Bid if you do not agree with our auction terms!

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Most Valuable Book

Most Valuable Book
Never published. Now you can do much more than merely dream about Success... Read on and discover... a Book so unique, that it raises the bar, shatters every myth about getting money, and delivers facts so brutally honest, that you may feel like you've just been punched in the gut.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Darth Vader Nugget?

Darth Vader Nugget
Darth Nugget!!

Our son was eating his Big Boy Meal from a well-known fast food chain when he exclaimed, "Mom! Dad! I've got Darth Sidious! You've got to see this!!!"

We were skeptical, at first, but THE FORCE drew us to it.

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Farting Salt And Pepper Shakers

Farting Salt And Pepper Shakers
ELECTRONIC FARTING SALT & PEPPER SHAKERS

These farting salt and pepper shakers will add entertainment to your next BBQ.

These fully functioning salt and pepper shakers fart when used. Your guests will love them they are the perfect party accessory and are a great conversation starter.


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No Smoking Onion Ring

No Smoking Onion Ring
How Cool is this! You are bidding on a REAL ONION RING that looks like a "Do Not Enter" or "No Smoking" sign, or even the Letter "Q"! Awsome! This is some serious "BLING" here! Hang it from your rear-view mirror, display as a conversation piece, wall art, or punk your friends! Have a friend whose name starts with the letter Q?

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Red Sox Curse Breaking Sign

Red Sox Curse Breaking Sign
This is a CRAZY Auction for Charity Supporting The Vermont Mountaineers. 75% of the proceeds will go to the Non-Profit Team and help the dreams of Future Baseball Stars.

6' X 6' RED SOX / BABE RUTH CURSE BREAKER HAUNTED STORY Baseball Banner!

You are bidding on what we believe to be a curse breaking baseball sign!

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Chocolate Virgin Mary?!

Chocolate Virgin Mary
This morning (2/22/07) while I was about to eat breakfast I noticed a rather bigger piece of Cocoa Pebble, so I picked it up and examined it and almost fell over!

There in the piece of Cocoa Pebble was the face of the Virgin Mary. Upon trembling I took a couple of pictures and have decided to put it up on ebay. The face is on the top left side of the cocoa pebble.

This is amazing, I'm still stunned. A one of a kind unique piece of cereal with the Virgin Mary's face on it. Unbelievable.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Simply Sensual Must Go!

Simply Sensual Must Go
Now REDUCED!!!

I'm loosing my ass on these works, come on, help me out and place a bid!!

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Cherry Ice Box Cookies!

Cherry Ice Box Cookies
THE BEST COOKIES EVER!!!

Cherry Ice Box Cookies From Local Bakery!!!

Words cant describe how good theses R, So hear how it will go once you win the auction I will call R local bakery and have these cookies baked fresh, then I will go straight home and seal the cookies in a foodsaver bag, then the same day I will go to the post office and ship EXPRESS(NEXT DAY) so yout cookies will be super super fress!!! These Cookies R Super Great No Big Chunks Of Cherries!!! If You Need Pics Holla At Me!!!

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Sunday, February 25, 2007

Jerry Seinfeld's Chewed Gum

Jerry Seinfeld's Chewed Gum
Up for auction is a piece of Jerry Seinfeld’s Chewed Gum ~ No Joke !!

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Y

Y
* * Y * *

Swarovski Austrian Crystal Y + free gifts

Y Do These Things Always Happen To Me ?!?

Y does it happen that the first day of my new diet always coincides with the day of the potluck staff lunch? There is an extra table just for the desserts!

Y does the copy machine always break down just before I have a huge, rush copying job to finish? I could just cry!

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Give Peace A Chance

Give Peace A Chance
The Give Peace A Chance Glass

It all happened one night while my boyfriend was watching the national nightly news and the anchorman reported how many soldiers had died in Iraq. He was so disgusted by what he heard that he slammed his drinking glass down on the table and the side of the glass cracked into a peace sign without breaking the rest of the glass. My boyfriend wanted to keep the glass, but it made him feel so much more at peace, I really felt that he needed to share it with others.

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Buy My Breast

Buy My Breast
I am walking in the Twin Cities Susan G Komen 3 Day Walk for the Cure and it goes without saying that I have to wear clothing every day! While I have a closet full of suitable clothing, it occurred to me that I was wasting valuable real estate by not putting the breasts God gave me to even more good use - and so I am offering to you this awesome opportunity with an extremely LOW reserve price!!!

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Real Douche Bag

Real Douche Bag
Brand New 1 Gallon Enema Douche Bag, Enema kit, Enema Equipment
You are bidding for a Brand New Douche Bag, 1 Gallon / approx 3.8 Litre / 4 Quart, complete with nozzle, rubber tube (150cm / approx 5 ft long)& douche fitting set (stop cork, vaginal tip & rectal pipe) as shown in the picture.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Shrek Does Weed?

Shrek Does Weed
The big green movie star shrek getting lit. this is a new never worn, L white t-shirt. this is a cool casual t-shirt that gets a laugh. great shirt to own if u like to party or just hanging with yr friends.

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2 Balls

2 Balls
I have big balls and she has been busting them for years.

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Small Pecker Condoms

Small Pecker Condoms
The ultimate joke!

Well, we’ve always attempted to get the worlds smallest things before, you know the Mini digital cameras & Mini Ipods, mini mania is at its best with these Mini Condoms.

These little rubbers make THE absolute insult. Revenge has never been so sweet.

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Jay Leno Drawing

Jay Leno Drawing
Special Ebay Celebrity Drawing 2007 of:

JAY LENO - of the Tonight Show.

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Coughing Lung Ashtray

Coughing Lung Ashtray
This funny ashtray is designed to look like a real pair of lungs. As you place a cigarette on the trough, the ashtray starts coughing!

This is a great novelty item for anyone trying to give up or unrepentant smokers, if nothing else, there's a certain sadistic pleasure in watching them think they're going crazy as their ashtray splutters away.

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Mr. Old Butt Pen Holder

Mr. Old Butt Pen Holder
What has the world come to?

Poor Mr Old Butt, no matter how he complains everyone just keeps on laughing at him.

Just insert a pen or pencil into his backside and this wretched old fellow moans, protests and very occasionally succumbs.

He throws his head up and down during his objections.

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2 Authentic Canadian Snowballs

2 Authentic Canadian Snowballs
AUTHENTIC CANADIAN SNOWBALLS POSSIBLY YOURS FOR JUST A PENNY.

APIECE OF CANADIAN HISTORY COME SUMMER THERE GONE.

2 COLD SNOWBALLS YOU CAN STORE THEM FOR A SNOWBALL FIGHT OR REFREEZE FOE 2 ICE CUBES TO KEEP YOUR DRINKS CANADIAN COLD THESE ARE FROM NORTHERN CANADA.

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Saturday, February 24, 2007

Lightning Face Of God?

Lightning Face Of God
My husband took this picture one night during a storm. It looks like the Face of God-Its Awesome!!! 8 x 10 print. He has other prints listed on Etsy.com under same seller.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Sexy Bikini Model Carwash

Sexy Bikini Model Carwash
Beautiful and sexy bikini model will wash and detail your car at your residence or your place of employment dressed in a sizzling bikini! What better way to gear up for summer than to enjoy a glass of lemonade and watch a swimsuit model detail your car??

You can even select a bikini from my wardrobe that you want me to wear! Your car will be washed, waxed, vacuumed, tire dressing will be applied, and the interior will be spotless as well!

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Bedroom Mood Meter

Bedroom Mood Meter
Wouldn't it be nice to have a way to tell if your about to get lucky or not?

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Sexy Nipple Enhancers

Sexy Nipple Enhancers
Nipple enhancement as seen in Sex in the City, get those sexy nipples you always wanted to have. One size fits all. They come with a very nice bag, as seen in the picture.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

My Booty

My Booty
"CHECK OUT MY BOOTY MYSTERY AUCTION"

MY CHEST ISN'T BAD EITHER.

THIS IS SURE TO BE ONE OF MY BIGGEST AND BEST MYSTERY AUCTIONS.

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Gold Eggs

Gold Eggs
GOLD EGGS! All 12 gold eggshells sprayed by 24K gold, these hard eggshells came from Guinea (Africian Chicken). Can shipping to someone you want, good for special, display or April's Fool Day.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Rob Van Winkle's Fork

Rob Van Winkle's Fork
Vanilla Ice's Fork!!! Thats right!

Ok, so here is how I came to own this fork.

In May 2004 I was waitressing at a resturant in Port Saint Lucie, FL. Where Rob Van Winkle resided with his wife, and two daughters.

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Life Size Rocking Horse

Life Size Rocking Horse
This little girl is a hand carved, life-size rocking horse... Sturdy and very safe!!

Meet Freya, the Celtic Goddess of Mischief!! 7 feet tall, 800 pounds, Freya happily carries 3 and 4 children, or 3 adults at a time Her brother, Vlad, is Guinness Book of World Records Largest Rocking Horse at 1,200 lbs., 7 ft. 8 inches!. We build these beauties and take them to renaissance faires, state and county fares across the country.

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Have Your Gaming Dice Blessed

Have Your Gaming Dice Blessed
The thrill of victory. The agony of defeat.

We’ve all experienced the polar opposites of these feelings. Often, the jubilation or disappointment we feel comes directly from the dice that we roll during sessions of our favorite games. Dice have determined whether our favorite characters have fallen to their deaths or managed to somehow grasp the thinnest of handholds when plummeting off of a treacherous cliff. The difference between striking down a dark prince intent on usurping his father and dominating a kingdom and languishing forever in manacles in the depths of a dank dungeon relies upon a single roll of the dice.

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American Idol Mystery

American Idol Mystery
Welcome everyone to round 1

2007 of American Idol Season Six

There are 24 contestants...

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Bald Britney In Straight Jacket

Bald Britney In Straight Jacket
From the maker of "Whores in the news" Spectrestudios presents...

**Britney Shears**

Poor Britney destined for the straight jacket and padded room.

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Keep Lovers Close

Keep Lovers Close
This lot contains 1 novelty ceramic jar with a cork lid jar reads ashes from past lovers approx 5 inches tall x 4-1/2 inches acrosss the bottom good condition no reserve.

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Friday, February 23, 2007

German Made Nose Flute

German Made Nose Flute
An outstanding Nose Flute. Made in Germany. Sounds richer than the Humanatone and is easier to play. With this musical instrument you can be playing like a pro in no time at all. If you can breathe through your nose you can play this flute. Instructions included. Bid on this one - Red with White trim and play classical music on it within minutes. Amaze your family and friends! Sounds similar to those black plastic flutes we all know and love from school. Start a band! Includes gold lame gig bag.

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Fat Finger Nose Hair Remover

Fat Finger Nose Hair Remover
Soft flesh-like housing.

Life-like fingernail and knuckle wrinkles.

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Hot Auction

Hot Auction
Are you a new member or maybe you just haven't ventured into the wild part of eBay?

It was the very wild sid of eBay that caught my attention and I have learned so much about it.

Now, I will pass that on to you.

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Victoria's Secret Adriana

Victoria's Secret Adriana
I had this listed in my store for over $5,000.00 in the frame.

THIS WILL NOT COME FRAMED

You are bidding on the canvas work!!!

VIEW AUCTION HERE

Smiley Face Flag

Smiley Face Flag